None of the parties emerged unscathed from these negotiations, starting with Ramirez, who pushed and shoved and quit his way out of Boston, all for a few extra million dollars.

Boras, Ramirez's agent, scoffed at the two-year, $45 million offer that the Dodgers presented him back in November. He is about to accept, ahem, a different two-year, $45 million offer.

The second year now will be a player option. The yearly breakdowns and schedules of deferred payments probably will be different. But the total guarantee will be the same.

McCourt, the Dodgers' owner, likely will consider himself a winner — by golly, I held the line! And it's true that the Dodgers will be getting Ramirez for less than half of the $100 million he originally wanted over four years.

Here's one problem: No other team made a serious bid for Ramirez, so the final price could have been lower if the Dodgers were willing to risk upsetting him. But the Dodgers, for all their recent bluster, wanted no part of such a confrontation.

Here's another problem: Player options never work in the club's favor. If Ramirez has a big season, he will again become a free agent. If he does not — or gets injured — he will stick the Dodgers for the second year.

May they all live happily ever after.